i’m not the one you should ask…but i’ll listen

12 Mar

I just finished an aim conversation with a friend. She was distraught and really needed someone to talk to. I’m flattered that she was comfortable enough to come to me. I’m glad we have that strong of a relationship. The thing is she wanted to talk about her recent breakup. Um, yeah I am no good when it comes to talking about that type of stuff. So I did my best trying to console her but at the same time I found it hard to relate to what she was talking about. It’s hard to give advice on a subject I absolutely know nothing about. If anything I was the person she needed to vent to and I’m fine with that but I wish I could have had more input in the matter instead of simple, cliché responses.
This got me thinking about my own relationships. The friends I have are amazing. I’ve had a lot of friends that are girls but never any girlfriends. Nothing serious. Nothing more than friends. Maybe it’s me. Maybe subconsciously I don’t want a girlfriend. Perhaps I’m not ready for that type of commitment. I don’t think that’s it though. I think it’s because I get comfortable with the idea that we are friends and I’m unwilling to make the move to something more.
The more I think about it the more apparent it is that I’ve let some of those opportunities go by. Maybe those were the only chances I had. I hope not.  There will be more opportunities, I just know it. When they do arrive I will be sure to go for it, not just sit there and hope something happens.
I’ve learned a lot about myself over the past few months. I know what I can be if I just open myself up and learn to let go of all the hang-ups. I’ve gained an extreme amount of confidence from the most amazing person and greatest friend anyone could ever hope for.


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